Wounding and healing are not opposites. They're part of the same thing. It is our wounds that enable us to be compassionate with the wounds of others. It is our limitations that make us kind to the limitations of other people. It is our loneliness that helps us to to find other people or to even know they're alone with an illness. I think I have served people perfectly with parts of myself I used to be ashamed of.
― Rachel Naomi Remen
Ever since I became a bodyworker, my understanding of healing has changed in two key ways:
- I believe that healing at the deepest level is about returning to wholeness.
- I believe that we do our own healing; no one else can heal us.
I guess #2 makes sense given #1. Certainly, another more common definition of healing is the process of recovery from injury, trauma or illness. But I don’t believe healing stops there. In fact, that’s what I’d call superficial healing. And while it may be important, it’s not complete.
In Rachel Naomi Remen’s book, 'Kitchen Table Wisdom - Stories that Heal', I recall one of the stories about a woman who had a terminal cancer. She worked with this patient for some time to assist her in coming to terms with her condition. At the end of the story, her patient passed away from the cancer. I don’t remember the exact verbiage used, but in that story Dr. Remen relayed that while her patient hadn’t been cured of her condition, she had still been healed. That story left a profound imprint in my mind and reshaped my understanding of healing.
What I love about the quote above is that it speaks to the concept of wholeness as it relates to healing. Basically, to be whole, we must accept our duality - the so called “good” and “bad” - rather than grasp for the “good” and resist the “bad” in ourselves. Thank you Dr. Remen for helping me to fine-tune my understanding of healing once again. Wounding and healing are not opposites... they are complements.
May we all experience healing each and every day.